Proposed Nicknames for All 60 Draftees

1. Blake “Gingerballs” Griffin
2. Hasheem “The Meme” Thabeet
3. James “Beardo” Harden
4. Tyreke “Jowls” Evans
5. Ricky “RubiBro” Rubio
6. “Jolly” Jonny Flynn
7. Stephen “Steve” Curry
8. Jordan “Dru” Hill
9. Demar “Dee Dee” DeRozan
10. Brandon “Ken” Jennings
11. Terrence “Scary Terry” Williams
12. Gerald “Male Pattern Baldness” Henderson
13. Tyler “Crunk Juice” Hansbrough
14. Earl “Jeepers Creepers” Clark
15. Austin “Ol’ Shatterbones” Daye
16. James “Joseph” Johnson
17. Jrue “Halitosis” Holiday
18. Ty “Clam Chowder” Lawson
19. Jeff “Fa” Teague
20. Eric “Mustard” Maynor
21. Darrin “Rick” Collison
22. Victor “The Beekeeper” Claver
23. Omri “Omribus” Casspi
24. BJ “Logs” Mullens
25. Rodrigue “Crayfish” Beaubois
26. Taj “Worst in the First” Gibson
27. DeMarre “Of the Marre” Carroll
28. “Squire” Wayne Ellington
29. Toney “Martin” Douglas
30. “Sister” Christian Eyenga
31. Jeff “Teddy” Pendergraph
32. Jermaine “Bespoke” Taylor
33. “Diamond” Dante Cunningham
34. Sergio “Cool” Llull
35. DaJuan “The Juan” Summers
36. Sam “Meat Lovers” Young
37. “Deadleg” DeJuan Blair
38. Jon Brockman aka “Bron Jockman”
39. Jonas “Bookshelves” Jerebko
40. Derrick “Murphy” Brown
41. Jodie “Fats” Meeks
42. Patrick “The” Beverly
43. Marcus “The Clawhammer” Thornton
44. Chase “Whoops!” Budinger
45. Nick Calathes aka “Nicky Lisp”
46. “Gorgeous” Danny Green
47. Henk “Cheese Biscuit” Norel
48. Taylor “Robin Lopez” Griffin
49. Sergey “The Noble Homo” Gladyr
50. Goran “Dark Chief” Suton
51. “Detective” Jack McClinton
52. AJ Price aka “General Cornballer III”
53. Nando De Colo aka “8 ½”
54. Robert “Bobby” Vaden
55. “Peppermint” Patty Mills
56. Ahmad “Paying Nividends” Nivins
57. Emir “The Smear” Preldzic
58. Lester Hudson aka “Jenny from the Block”
59. Chinemelu “Cranberry” Elonu
60. Robert Dozier aka “Twitchy”

Found Item: The Minnesota Timberwolves Draft Board

During last night's draft, a lot of people were getting a kick out of the Timberwolves drafting every point guard they could during the first round. It was so funny, in fact, that I coined* the name TimberLOLves to describe the foibles of new GM David Kahn. But then I got my hands on what I am told was their only drafting resource. Then things made sense. Have a look:

*Another coined term from last night: Ricky RubiBro, which is going to be huge.

Future Phoenix Suns Draft Picks

Jim Duncan

-------------Billy Ripken

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Conrad Rubio

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Daniel Artest

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LaRon James

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