Jersey Shore Power Rankings Week 3: Faceplants Are Now Called Snookis

Well we are back with the Jersey Shore Power Rankings where they probably will be live right before the show begins at 9 pm.  I am still waiting for the attention I rightly deserve from any of the cast members, or the Reality Czar himself Dave Jacoby.  But let's take a look at Monday's episode, if you need the categories there are right here.



1.) The Situation: Last Week (1st) Total Points Score (63)
How He Scored: 18Q 5S 3HU 3JA
Overall Thoughts: The Sitch continues his run at the top spot with his 'Kitchen Ditchin' which is an excellent way to get a grenade or someone you do not want to smush out of your bedroom.  Then again, if you somehow brought home a whale, Kitchin Ditchin might not be the right move because they are hungry too. I also enjoyed his comment about Deena's early exit: "Deena likes to call herself a holiday, I like to think of her as a Holiday Inn and it closed early with 6 minutes and 53 seconds."

2.) Vinny: LW (2nd) TPS (59)
How He Scored: 17Q 5S 3HU
Overall Thoughts: I might score Vinny higher because he is my favorite cast member. Vinny would be my top pick to go out and have a beer with.  He also has become the 'Women Whisperer' since the second season down in Miami.  He just bring home girls with so much ease, I need his wisdom.  I also enjoyed his take on Ronnie's laugh "Ronnie has two laughs, "one is a little girly laugh, the other sounds like a dolphin on steroids."

3.) Pauly D: LW (3rd) TPS (51)
How He Scored:15Q 3JA 3HU 2FP 2OC
Overall Thoughts: For the first time this season, Pauly busted out the fist pump, but it was another version, still enjoyable. I also liked his take on girl talk when a guy is there. Listen ladies, there is no reason to discuss your issues with each other with us around. I also like Pauly comments about annoying customers in retail world. I hate it, happens all the time.

4.) Snooki: LW (7th) TPS (48)
How She Scored: 18D 9Q 9JA 3HU -2OC -4A -5RB\
Overall Thoughts: This episode should have just been called "Let's watch Snooki get insanely wasted for the whole 60 minutes of the show!" She worked an impressive bender that I have done, but your body hates you so much on Sunday. I cannot even imagine what her hangovers are like, or if they just don't happen because her liver has rotted away.

5.) JWoww: LW (4th) TPS (38)
How She Scored: 6Q 5D 3JA 2OC -3C
Overall Thoughts: JWoww continues to get hotter. We use to always think how she looked like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, but now, she is hot all the time.  Also I really think she decides what she going to wear on how big do her boobs look in it.  Every damn time those things look tremendous like something I would want to sleep on.

6.) Deena: LW (6th) TPS (26)
How She Scored: 8D 2OC -2A -3C
Overall Thoughts: As I predicted a couple weeks ago, she faded off because she tries to top Snooki and it never works. I did enjoy seeing a couple faceplants on the dancefloor

7.) Ronnie: LW (7th) TPS (10)
How He Scored: 8Q 4F 3JA
Overall Thoughts: "I love single Ronnie." I did enjoy him calling Sammi out on her shit, and cooking frozen burgers on the grill. Some of Ronnie's finest moments.

8.) Sammi: LW (8th) TPS -14)
How She Scored: 6JA -3C
Overall Thoughts: Well.. She didn't act like a bitch for the first time in like 7 episodes so that's a positive. She is still a wet blanket though.

-Charlie.